- Every six seconds, a new dual-stick shooter in the vein of Robotron is released on a console download service. At least, that's what it feels like these days. While every one of these games has its own spin on the genre, few go as bananas as Nucleus. Nucleus is like some weird combination of Robotron and the movie Fantastic Voyage. You control a "remote unit," a sperm-looking robot...thing that fights viruses and nuclei inside some sort of living organism. Along the way, you blast away at, drag around, and push various cells for a variety of purposes, from blocking enemy shots to collecting power-ups for your special weapon. It all sounds kind of interesting, but in execution, it's actually quite dull.
The problems begin with your remote unit, which is about as speedy as a snail with a brick taped to its back. You can dart forward for a quick moment, or "squirt" as the game refers to it. Squirting, however, still feels a bit sluggish, and you basically have to hammer on the button several times to get anywhere quickly.
After you realize you're in control of a sperm that couldn't make it to the urethral tract without stopping for a breather, you'll discover that combat isn't much better. You start out with a rather piddly default shooter (that eventually upgrades into more powerful weaponry), which, like...